Ladies and gentlemen,
here is tonight's extra special attraction.
That ridin', ropin'fool,
your western pal and mine, Bronco Bob Mitchell.
"Bunko" Bob Mitchell!
That phony's never been west of the Hudson River.
How about all those books he wrote?
I Fought Cattle Rustlers. I Caught Horse Thieves.
I caught him where it hurts. Read my column today.
If it's true, it'll be the biggest scoop of the year. Sure it's true.
I'm making book at 10-to-1 Bronco Bob doesn't show up tonight or any night.
Bob, you've never been on a horse in your life. I'll bet the horse knows it.
Forget the riding. Walk out there and sing 'em a song.
I'll tell 'em you've got a broken neck.
Pete, you saw what Martin Manning wrote in his column. Yeah.
Do you want my public to think he's right? He is right!
I admit starting all this Bronco Bob buildup to sell your books but...
Mr. Mitchell, you're on. But can he stay on?
Not that side, the other side. Even I know that.
Anne, you should be gettin' ready for the contest.
And miss a chance to hear Bronco Bob sing?
That $10,000 will wait a few minutes.
Give me my saddle
And let me ride
The painted hills I love
Where I can speak with passing stars
And touch the moon above
Give me my saddle
And let me go
Up where the rivers start
Where I can let a western breeze
Go singing through my heart
They must have used a magic brush
To paint the West so fair
I know it must be just a step
Up to heaven from there
So give me my saddle
And while I live
I only want to ride
The purple hills and have my love
A-ridin' by my side
So give me my saddle
And while I live
I only want to ride
The purple hills and have my love
A- ridin' by my side
A-ridin' by
My side
Come on, boy.
Giddyup, faster. Come on, giddyup!
Giddyup, giddyup.
Hey, Willoughby, get off that horse before the boss catches you.
Look out, Duke. I'll run over you.
Get off that horse, I'm warnin' you. I'm playin' cowboy.
You know what the boss told you. What?
The next time he catches you playing cowboy he's gonna fire you.
Yeah? Come on, help me sell this stuff.
Duke, did you see me? I was standing next to a real, live jackass.
Did you ever ride a jackass? No.
You oughta get on to yourself. Come on. Peanuts!
I get it. You think I'm a dummy?
Hot dogs, red hot!
Hot dogs! Hot... dog!
Did you ever ride a jackass? No.
Jump on my back. No.
Manning, did my boy convince you he's the real thing? So he can ride a horse.
That doesn't prove he's the great western hero his books say he is.
Won't anything ever convince you?
I'll make you a little... Excuse me. I'll have a hot dog.
Hot dogs! Don't push!
Peanuts! Hot dogs! Get 'em while the manager's hot.
Boy, five peanuts. Boy, five peanuts.
Five peanuts, right? Here you are.
Here's one, two, three, four and a half, five.
The man wants five bags of peanuts. Oh, five bags.
What a business I'm doin'! One, two, three, four, five.
50 cents. Right. Here it is.
Peanuts, popcorn.
Hey, Duke. Come here. What's the matter?
The guy threw 50 cents and... Well, look for it.
What's the matter? Bashful.
What happened? Where did it go? Down the back.
Don't look.
Wait a minute. Get her to stand up. Maybe it'll fall out.
Get her to stand up? Sure.
I beg your pardon, madam. Do you mind? Could I get you a better seat?
No, thank you. I'm very comfortable.
Besides, I paid a dollar for this seat.
You just got 50 cents change.
Come here. What?
I'll get her to stand up. You get the coin when it drops south.
Okay. Go ahead, go ahead.
You don't have to stand up.
I'm going downstairs.
Hey, did you get it?
I missed it by a foot. It went down her shoe. What?
I beg your pardon. Are you comfortable? Yes, I am.
If you want to make yourself feel at home, you can take your shoes off.
Listen, if you don't hotfoot it away from here,
I'll call an officer.
- Hey, hotfoot. - Hotfoot?
Hey, I told you to peddle those peanuts. Now get goin'!
I said get goin'! Okay, boss.
I hope those vendors weren't annoying you.
They are persistent salesmen.
They may be persistent, but they're not salesmen.
Look out for the manager. I'd like to give him a hotfoot too.
Those fellows burn me up.
Did you get it?
Hiya, partner.
There he goes. He just went...
Don't push. I'm not pushing.
Don't talk so loud. We don't want to go out till we know we're clear.
Don't push. Get over! I'm not pushing.
Will you get over? Get over yourself.
Hey, Duke. Quiet. What?
Where did you pick up the fur coat? What fur coat?
Oh, it's a pretty... It's a pretty...
Another five minutes of you signing autographs, I'd have had a nervous breakdown.
No, Miss Anne!
Miss Anne.
Are you all right? I'm all right.
Nice piece of bulldoggin', miss. Get him out.
Are you hurt, Miss Anne?
I'm okay, Joe. Okay.
You sure you're not hurt? It's just my leg, Ruby.
Mean ol' bull. I'm terribly sorry.
So you're Bronco Bob, the pride of the West.
You certainly looked it. Any real rider could have sat his horse...
and bulldogged that steer himself.
Get out of here before somebody comes.
This young lady may be hurt. You want to lose that contract?
Tell him to get out of here. If this gets out, he'll be ruined.
Go on, Mr. Mitchell. I wouldn't dream of hurting your career.
Come on, beat it, will ya? Ruby.
Miss Anne! Miss Anne! Let's get her into first aid.
We're sorry you got hurt. It's our fault.
Duke and I were running to hide from the boss...
and I let the cow's husband out. He means the bull.
Bull, nothin'. It's a fact.
That's all right, boys. It wasn't done intentionally.
Tell one of the attendants to bring up a stretcher. Yes, sir.
She'll be all right. I'll phone the hospital and make arrangements.
Hospital? Hospital?
I've gotta ride in the finals tonight. Out of the question, miss.
That may be only a sprain, but I'll have to x-ray to be sure.
The next event, ladies and gentlemen,
the finals of the women's trick-riding contest,
America's greatest cowgirls risking life and limb...
for that grand prize of $10,000.
Can I come in?
Hiding from your public?
No, and thanks to you I still have one.
I wanted to tell you how sorry I am that you got hurt.
Any girl would gladly sacrifice her life to save the great Bronco Bob Mitchell.
Everybody tells me that you'd have been a cinch to win that $10,000 prize.
You'd make me feel better if you'd accept this check.
I wasn't sure about the spelling of the name, so I made it out like that.
What's the matter? Afraid that I'll tell someone you're a four-flusher?
I wouldn't dream of disillusioning your public, Mr. Bronco Bob Mitchell.
Now, take your check and get out of here.
Did I just give the works to that Martin Manning!
I made him admit you operated that horse like it was a kiddy car.
How 'bout the girl? She'll be all right.
You fixed everything? Yeah, I fixed everything.
That's kind of a tough break for her. Her old man runs a dude ranch.
It meant a lot of customers if she'd won this championship.
Dude ranch? Where? Who cares where?
You're going to Connecticut and start that new story.
I'm gonna finish this one first.
Come on, let's get out of here.
That boy's worried. What makes you think he's worried?
I don't know. He must be. Why?
He just threw away a check for $10,000. Ain't I unlucky.
It wasn't made out to me.
Who was it made out to? Some guy named "cash. "
- Why, you... - Hey, you fellas.
The boss! Come on!
Let's hide in this dark tunnel.
Quiet! Don't let them know we're up here.
What do you mean? They know I'm here.
You!
This goes too.
Let's load the next one.
Hey, boys, you...
Anybody in there?
Nobody but us cows. Thanks.
Wait!
What's the idea?
Hey, it's a cow!
Hey, what are you guys doing?
We wanna talk to you! Come here!
They don't seem to be around here.
Well, they went this way.
Hey, Duke. What?
Look, a train whistle. Where?
Right here.
Hey! What the heck!
No, this way. Come on.
There they go!
All right, boys, let's get movin'. Okay.
Oh, boy. Can I help you?
Thanks, pal. Don't mention it.
Wait a minute!
Come on, get on. Okay.
Quiet.
Who put out the lights? Here, here.
That was a narrow escape. You're telling me.
You think we ditched 'em? Look out the back and find out.
Why don't you? Look out the back door!
Why do you make me do these things? Go ahead.
Okay. Go ahead. What are you afraid of?
Huh? Nope.
I think we ditched 'em. Swell.
Boy, that was a narrow escape.
What's the matter? What happened? Hey, Duke!
Don't get excited. We've been shanghaied.
Shanghaied?
What are you doin' with that red flag?
Some dummy left it hangin' up outside. Get rid of it.
What are you playin'? A little game of poker.
Poker? That's the one game I never played.
I don't know a thing about this game. I'm so ignorant when it comes to cards.
Never played a game of poker? Nope.
Is this anything like dice? Well, uh, yes.
Sit down. I'll teach you the game.
I wanna learn. He's gonna teach me.
Sure, a friendly little game.
First man I find cheatin', I'll shoot his hat off. Sure.
How many chips do you want? Chips?
You gotta buy chips. How much do I buy?
How much money have you got? I got some.
What's the matter?
What are you so happy about? I was tickling myself.
That's enough. There you are. No tax?
I'll deal.
Where's your ante? I beg your pardon?
Where's your ante? She's home with my uncle.
I didn't know he knew about my relatives. No, no, no.
Feed the kitty. Here, pussy. Here, pussy.
Get me some milk, please. No, no. Put up like this.
I told you I didn't know anything about poker. Did you open?
I'll stay. What'll you do? Either raise or call.
Call who? The man that made the bet.
Hey, you! No, no, no. Put a dollar in the pot.
Oh, silly game.
The pot on the table. On the table?
Certainly.
Will you take that off! What are you doing? You told me to!
Hey, you, ante up. Ante up!
Who you yellin' at? You!
Do I get in these messes.
Excuse me, please. Sit down.
I didn't know how big you was.
If you was a small guy, I might've said something. Shh.
Look at the size of that guy! Mmm-mmm-mmm. Keep quiet.
Aw, break it up and wake up Wake up, Jacob
You can't lie dreamin'in the sun all day
You gotta keepjumpin' to amount to sumpin'
You gotta get out and pitch some hay
So break it up and wake up Wake up, Jacob
You won't be president in that a-way
You can't be reclinin' while the sun is shinin'
You gotta get out and pitch some hay
You gotta be in there pitchin' steady
'Cause opportunity knocks one time, no more
When "opp" knocks you gotta be ready
To get up and open the door
Well, break it up and wake up Wake up, Jacob
You can't lie dreamin' in the sun all day
You gotta keep jumpin' to amount to sumpin'
You gotta get out and pitch some hay
Break it up and wake up Wake up, Jacob
You can't be dreamin' in the sun all day
You gotta keep jumpin' to amount to sumpin'
You gotta get up, get out and pitch some hay
Break it up Jake, boy
Don't be that a-way
Break it up, Jake, boy You gotta start to pitch some hay
Ooo-ooo wake up
Get up and start things hummin'
Ooo-ooo wake up
Maybe there's a payin' customer comin'
Keep on pitchin' steady
'Cause opportunity knocks one time, no more
When "opp" knocks you gotta be ready
To open the door open the door
Come on and break it up and wake up, Jacob
You can't lie dreamin' in the sun all day
You gotta keep jumpin' to amount to sumpin'
You gotta get up, get out make hay, hay, hay, hay, hay
Wake up, Jake Wake up
Passenger train comin'. Tourists, tourists, tourists!
Anne! Dotty!
Where's Dad? Dad!
Darling, thank you.
No, thanks.
Well, how are you? Good as new and twice as fresh.
Sorry I couldn't bring home that prize money.
What happened? It's a long story. Let's go.
I thought it was a short story. Hello.
Oh, Mr. Mitchell.
Careful your train doesn't go off and leave you.
Are you Mr. Mitchell? Bronco Bob? That's right.
I'm glad to see ya. I got your wire about reservations.
Proud to have you as a guest. Thank you, sir.
A guest? At the Lazy "S"?
When I told the boys, they were mighty pleased.
They're countin' on pickin' up a few pointers from ya.
Alabam, here she is.
Alabam, how are you? Swell, now that you're back.
This place seems like a desert without you around.
Mr. Mitchell, you must meet Alabam Brewster, our foreman,
and the best rider in this part of the country.
How are you, Mr. Mitchell? Glad to know you.
He's terrific at bulldogging.
You two should have a lot in common.
Let's go. See you at the ranch.
Welcome home, Miss Anne. Thank you.
The stock's just pullin' in.
I'll give the boys a hand and be right along. All right.
You did all right. I could have done better if...
Duke, real Indians! We'll be attacked!
Put the freight cars in a circle! Never mind, boy.
Send the pony express. I sell souvenirs. Souvenirs.
He sells souvenirs. Step over to my shop.
I sell Indian springwater. With every bottle, I give away a bow and arrow.
How do you like that? All my life I wanted a bow and arrow.
I wish I had one now. I'd knock off a lot of Ind...
You want to get us in trouble with these Indians?
Shush. Don't be scared of any Indians.
You show me one Indian, I'll show you a coward.
I'm an Indian. I'm a coward.
Step this way, gentlemen. What's the matter with you? Come on.
Unravel the freight cars. It's safe. Everything's all right.
Look, a real, genuine Indian bow and arrow.
"Made in Cleveland. " Didn't you ever hear of the Cleveland Indians?
Now stop! Here, gentlemen.
It'll make you feel good, like rain in the face.
That's what we need. We could use some.
Buy a jug. That's all you do, put your hand in your pocket.
You never come up with nothin'. Buy a jug!
What am I, the treasurer and everything else? Go ahead.
Very refreshing, huh? Oh, yeah.
What in the world is this?
Where'd he go? Over that way.
Oh, boy. That's a fine trick you played on me.
I'll call it even if you'll tell me what those people are talkin' about.
My tribe are saying the man who shoots an arrow...
through the tent of an eligible squaw must marry her.
I think it's a very good law.
That law should be all over the country.
You marry her. I don't wanna mar...
You gotta marry her. Not me.
You shot an arrow through the heart of her tepee.
Therefore, you must marry her.
I'll see ya later.
Come along! I don't wanna marry her.
I'm not gonna marry no girl.
She might be beautiful. I don't care. I'm not gonna marry her.
I wouldn't marry the most beautiful girl in the world.
I can be wrong.
Hello.
I'm some marksman. I shot my arrow through your tent.
No, I'm Sunbeam. Your arrow pierced the tent...
of my sister, Moonbeam. Moonbeam? Sunbeam?
Hey, Duke, must be twins.
Find out. I think I will.
Moonbeam!
Yes, sweetheart?
Will there ever be an end to that? She called me sweetheart.
Don't worry, little sister.
We'll have a bow-and-arrow wedding.
A-tisket a-tasket
A brown and yellow basket
I send a letter to my mommy
On the way I dropped it
I dropped it
Yes, on the way I dropped it
A little girlie picked it up
And put it in her pocket
She was truckin' on down the avenue
With not a single thing to do
She went a beg, beg, beggin' all around
When she spied it on the ground
She took it She took it
My little yellow basket
And if she doesn't bring it back
I think that I will die
Oh, gee
I wonder where my basket can be
So do we, So do we So do we
So do we
Oh, dear
I wish that little girl I could see
So do we, So do we So do we, So do we
So do we! So do we!
Oh, why was I so careless with that basket of mine
That itty-bitty basket was a joy of mine
A-tisket a-tasket
I lost my yellow basket
Won't someone help me find my basket
And make me happy again again
- Was it red? - No, no, no, no
- Was it green? - No, no, no, no
- Was it cerise? - No, no, no!
Just a little yellow basket
A little yellow basket
What are you doing here? Somebody has to look after you. This idea of yours is crazy.
Hey, boys.
You lookin' for me?
We're tryin' to find out where we are. You're at the Lazy "S" Ranch.
Are you lookin' for work? Not if I can find anything else to do.
Could you use a couple of good men?
Did you ever punch cattle?
I should say not. I never hit animals.
He's only kidding. That boy is a son of the West.
Oh, really? Reared on the prairie.
He had a saddle for a cradle.
The moos of the cattle was his lullaby. That's right!
Sure. Every time I hear moos I go to sleep.
You boys certainly have a good sense of humor.
Hop over to the bunkhouse and get some work clothes. I'll be in the office.
Thanks a lot.
We've got a job. What are you waiting for?
Duke, I didn't know cowboys lived in nice houses like this. Sure.
Look at the big bathtub they got!
Never mind the tub. Look at the girls in it!
Oh, girls!
Woo!
How do you do? I'm Dotty Davis, the ranch hostess.
Are you gentlemen taken care of? Everything's dandy.
If I can do anything, just whistle.
Let's grab ourselves a swim. Yeah.
Over here's bathing suits. Come on.
Did you take a shower? Is there one missing?
Get your suit wet! Oh, get my suit wet.
Here you are. What's that?
I got it wet. No! Dive in!
Get in the pool. Take advantage of it. Okay.
How deep is it? Up to my neck.
Okay, here I come.
Take it easy, kid. I got ya.
Take it easy, girls. I got ya.
Did I save ya? Did I save ya?
I saved the three...
Are you the guy that told me it was up to my neck?
Yeah. What are you gonna do about it?
Why...
You ever find the guy that stole that shower?
Listen, these people are all watching you.
Go up to that springboard. They're expecting an exhibition.
Go ahead. He'll be right up there, folks.
All right, folks.
Get up on the board and show the folks how you can dive.
Go on. Don't push. I'm gonna get up.
Well, get up. I mean, after all...
Go ahead, get up. Go out on the board.
Go ahead. Champion.
Go ahead, Willoughby. The folks are waiting.
Get up on the board. Wait a minute! That's enough for me.
Stand still! Get up... Ooo!
Ooo, my head! Hey, Duke, my head!
Never mind your head.
Hey, Duke!
Get off my fingers!
Get me off here, will ya?
You wanna break that diving board?
Get me off, will ya?
Willoughby, get up!
What's the matter with you?
Is those pigeons divin' off of me?
Duke! Duke!
What are you all standing around for? He can't swim!
Willoughby! Get him out of there.
Willoughby, this is Duke talking.
We'll get him.
Come on, Willoughby.
Hey, Duke! Are you all right?
Hey, Duke! Duke! Come on, yes, yes.
I saw octopuses, all kinds of fishes.
Why didn't you come up? Nobody told me I had to.
Did I save all those lives? No.
Are them lives I saved? You're all right.
Oh, boy! Willoughby! There he goes again!
Hi, Jack!
How are you? Welcome home, Miss Anne.
Thank you. What can we do for you?
I hear you got Bronco Bob Mitchell stayin' at your place.
That's right. What about it? The boys'd like to meet him.
Maybe I can arrange it.
Oh, Mr. Mitchell! Here he comes.
Well, Bronco Bob himself. Right proud to meet you.
Howdy, Bronco. How do you do?
Me and the boys rode out to thank you personal-like.
Thank me? Sure, for entering our rodeo,
big event of the Frontier Days Celebration.
We're turning the receipts over to a hospital for kids.
Having a celebrity like you ought to double our take.
Did you enter in a rodeo? He sure did.
Got this telegram a few hours ago.
"My old friend, Bronco Bob Mitchell,
wishes me to announce his entry in the broncobusting event...
of your Frontier Days Rodeo.
Signed, Martin Manning."
Good ol' Manning, always ahead of the news.
It's all on the level?
We can count on you? Bob, wait. You...
It makes a difference in the dough we take in for that hospital.
All right, boys, you can count on me.
Swell, thanks. Thanks a lot.
So long. See you later, Anne.
Broncobusting! You're beginning to believe your own publicity.
So, you entered the rodeo and decided to represent the Lazy "S."
Now isn't that wonderful! The fact that it's going to keep our outfit...
from winning the team prize doesn't matter.
I don't like myself as a phony any more than you do. Then why be one?
All my life I've tried to be a writer,
and all I got was a trunk full of rejection slips...
until one day I happened to write a western story.
I wrote more westerns and they clicked too and that was the beginning.
This Bronco Bob buildup was my publisher's idea.
Well, why keep it up?
I can't tell the truth now. There are too many people involved.
There are Bronco Bob toys, souvenirs, all the rest.
A couple hundred people make a living...
out of a guy that doesn't even exist.
I never realized that.
The only reason I came out here is because I had some sort of a crazy idea...
that Bob Mitchell might learn to do some things that Bronco Bob is supposed to do...
ifhe had the right teacher. You mean Alabam?
I mean you. Mr. Mitchell?
As long as you're gonna be on our team,
I thought you'd like to pick the horse you wanna ride.
Uh, right now? We wanna be sure you get the best.
Don't we, honey?
Come along, Bronco.
Oh, bury me not
On the lone... prairie
Where the flyin' fishes
Duke, look! Hey, what are you...
Here, you can have it. What are you doing?
Why don't you look where you're shooting?
I guess I'm not inquisitive. You don't know what you're doing!
Hey, Duke. What?
Please don't be mad at me. Why shouldn't I?
Without you, I don't know what I'd do.
Please, look at me. Don't point that gun at me!
I'm sorry. Going around with a gun in your hand.
I'll fix you. Hold that bullet. Yes, sir.
There you are. Hold these bullets. Hold the bullets!
Put that gun away... and keep away from me!
Hey, Duke, I swallowed the bullet.
It's my own fault anyway.
I'm always gettin' you into trouble.
I don't know why.
I deserve a good kick in the pants!
Hey, Duke.
Shh, shh!
Hey.
Put that down. What's the matter with you?
There, take your pick.
Maybe you better not ride today. There's no time like the present.
Pick that tame-looking one.
I'll take that one right there.
Say, you do know your horseflesh.
That's Wildcat, the toughest piece of bronco I ever roped.
Wildcat!
If he tries to get on a horse again, he's got a lot of nerve.
You're telling me. That guy can't even ride. I know.
Hey, boss!
What's this shushing stuff? If you tell on Bob, I'll tell on you.
What do you mean? You're talking to a real cowboy.
One hot dog, please. Yes, ma'am. Well, so you got me.
We won't tell. And you?
Not a word. Gee, thanks.
Hey, you two.
Get busy and rope Wildcat, that little bay.
Can you ride him?
That one? Yes.
He's talking to you. What about it?
I'm not gonna rope no horse. You go ahead. Wait a minute.
You want him to think I'm scared? But after all...
Do you want him to think that I'm yellow? No!
I'm not gonna rope that! Tell you what I'll do.
I'll wait out here. You go in there.
No, sir. You ain't gonna put that over on me.
Then you go in there and I'll wait out here.
That's better. All right, go ahead. Get going.
Make it snappy. Go on. Get in there.
He's a killer. That's all I wanna know.
What's the matter? The man said he's a killer.
He can't hurt us.
- Borrow my rope, buddy. - Go ahead, go ahead.
Go ahead, get over there.
Okay. Throw it!
That's it, get it. Hey, I got him.
Pull him in. I got him. I think he's got me.
If I didn't like ya, I wouldn't let you do this.
Wish you wouldn't like me so much. Pull him in.
Look, look!
It's a horse. Take it easy. What is this?
What kind of horse is that? Not that one. Wildcat.
Another one? The one over there.
Go ahead. What's the matter with you?
Let me through! Aw, come on.
Pull me through!
Go out and let him know who's boss. He knows who's boss!
Are you trying to show me up in front of these boys? No.
Then go out there. You want me to go there with that wildcat?
Okay, pal. So long, everybody. Not that way!
Will you please... This guy's always in the way.
Take this rope off.
Get over there. Now lasso him. Throw the rope out.
Get outta here. Do a nice job.
Wait! Take it easy. You'll choke yourself.
Throw it out. Get it out, way out.
Hey, boss, I think I missed. I think you did too.
Hey, Duke, save me! Save me! Save me!
Get him out of there before he gets hurt.
Nice work, pal. We'll handle him for ya.
Shut that gate!
Bring him back here.
Hurry up, boys.
Mr. Mitchell, we'll have him ready for you in just a minute.
Hurry up, boys. That's it.
This is the safest place in the whole corral.
Come on, get down.
Get me off!
Hey, Duke... Whoa, boy! Whoa!
The little guy's plenty good.
Hey, Duke! Duke! Get me off! Get me off!
- Grab my hand. - Get me off!
Ya-hoo! Look at that!
Bring that horse back!
You better get me this time. I'm gonna come around again.
- Grab my hand. - Get me off the horse!
How do you turn this thing off?
You all right?
Hey, Bob, get us off. Come on, Bob. Get us off!
Hold on!
Get me off! Get me off!
Alabam, they were terrific!
Nice work. I never realized you were so good.
Yeah? Yeah.
Hey, Duke... Poor Duke... couldn't take it.
Come on.
Beside the Rio Tonto
On a starlit trail
He fell in love with her smile
One autumn while the moon was pale
And he knew that she loved him
Just by the look that she wore
That evening beside
The Rio Tonto shore
Two hearts were young and happy
Love was all aglow
And as they laughed and they dreamed
The heavens seemed to overflow
Then one day he grew restless
To roam and wander once more
He left her beside
The Rio Tonto shore
He said his love for her would be undying
And he'd return when his wandering was through
But her poor heart whispered sadly he's lying
It's strange how it knew
And yet each night she waits there
On the starlit trail
And prays he'll come back again
Some autumn when the moon is pale
And as each evening passes
She sighs and waits just one more
He'll find her beside
The Rio Tonto shore
There you are, boys. I guess it's warm now.
Thanks, Ruby. I never minded a baby before.
Well, is it all right?
It's the right temperature. I gotta make my own formulas.
It's your work now.
Be nice, take your din-din. Oh, give it to her.
Come on, take your din-din.
Don't be such a hog. I feel so motherly,
I should have went to Vassar.
Will you shut her up?
Hey, Duke, think there's a pin sticking her? Nah.
I don't think so now.
If you're going someplace, why don't you take me with you?
How would you like to attend another barbecue?
What are you doing here? We moved the tribe down for his wedding to Moonbeam.
I'm too young to be a bride. Get your trousseau ready.
They let us go, but they sure mean business.
Duke, Duke. What happened?
They got me. They what?
They got me. Hey, Duke. No, no, Willoughby!
When you get back to New York,
tell the folks I died with my boots on.
Duke! Don't go away. All right, Willoughby.
Don't go away! Pull yourself together. I won't!
Were you ever shot? It's a burning feeling.
I don't mean indigestion. I know how you feel.
This is awful.
Wait a minute. Twice in the same place I got it.
Duke? It's a couple of cowboys at target practice.
I know...
What's the matter with you? Hmph!
Disappointed, eh?
That's it, that's right. You've got him.
How long did that take? 43 seconds, you're improving.
Yeah, but not enough. Bob, if you'll just do it like this.
If she don't like him, why's she doing that?
That's love. Oh, no. Oh, no.
Love is when you're parked in a car.
What do you think?
You're all right. There's nothing to it.
You expect me to do that? Sure, and better.
It was a great life while it lasted.
Mount from the squaw side, the right.
Well, here we go.
That's it. Hold it.
That's it!
Bob!
Bob! Bob!
Are ya hurt?
Oh, Bob.
Bob? Hi.
You faker!
What are you two doing here?
We're just watching. Yeah, she's teachin' him to...
To what? Two and two make four and four and four make eight.
And eight and eight... Then there's geography.
Get up to the barn. It's milkin' time.
Do I have to milk that bunch of cows?
No, not bunch, herd. Heard what?
Herd of cows. Sure, I heard of cows. Think I'm a dummy?
No, a cow herd. What do I care if a cow heard?
I didn't say anything to be ashamed of.
Do you know what a cow gives?
A cow gives milk. No, she don't.
You gotta take it away from her. Let's get over to the barn.
What are you doing down there?
Tryin' to do this. Don't lean on me!
There must be a better way.
Can you move her over? Move the stuff over.
Get off the finger! Duke, she's on my hand.
Get it out. Get it out! Get it out!
Get it out yourself. You milk her from the back.
From the back? Certainly, not down there.
Cowboy! You've got to learn sometime.
Now what are you doing? There's none of those things up here.
Duke, give me a pail. Will you listen to me?
You milk her on the stool. Oh, on the stool?
On the stool. Now I know.
Get off there. Here. Stool.
Sit down.
Not you, the cow. What for?
I'm gonna milk her. No, no, no, here, put that under the udder.
The other what? The cow's udder.
Cow's other what? Under here, please!
Sit down there. Milk the cow. You mean under the crankcase.
All right, call it what you want. Get some milk.
Get some milk.
No?
Come on, come on, give me some milk.
Hey, you! Come on! Get in line!
I was here first. What are you trying to do?
Why don't you pick on somebody your size? I was here first.
I'm tryin' to get some milk myself, you know.
After all!
Must have run dry.
Don't look at me. It ain't my fault. First time I come here.
Hey, Duke! Duke, Duke. What's the matter?
Help me milk this cow. No, this is a steer. A steer don't give milk.
No? No!
Where does "steeralized" milk come from? Make it snappy.
I'm dying for a drink of raw milk. Okay.
All you get in restaurants is "A" milk and "B" milk. Bee milk?
Do bees give milk? No, honey.
Thanks, dear. Oh, come on, get with it.
Oooh! A four-tube set.
How do you tune it in?
You can never trust a woman, can ya?
Will ya cut it out? Dare ya to do it once more.
She did. Give me somethin'.
You do it once more I'll...
Once more...
I guess that'll hold ya.
This is a fine time to be sleeping.
Come on, get up. Come on, wake up.
What's the matter? What happened? Come on.
What's the matter with you? Peanuts! Hot dogs! Milk!
Uh-oh!
That's trouble. Wait a minute.
This looks bad.
"We've got the Indian sign on you. Get a wedding license ready or else!"
Or else? I'm gettin' sick and tired of havin' Indians threaten me.
I'll give 'em 10 minutes to get out of town.
How long? I'll give 'em five minutes to get out of town.
How long? Give me 10 seconds and I'll be packed.
Are you gonna let them get away with that? No!
That's a boy. I'll get those dirty redskins!
I knew it was in ya. Which way did these arrows come from?
That way! That way? Let's... go this way!
This lovely day has lengthened
Into evening
We'll sigh good-bye
To all we've ever had
Alone where we have walked together
I'll remember April
And be glad
I'll be content
You loved me once in April
Your lips were warm
And love and spring were new
But I'm not afraid of autumn
And her sorrow
For I'll remember
April and you
The fire will dwindle
Into glowing ashes
For flames and love live
Such a little while
I won't forget
But I won't be lonely
I'll remember April
And I'll smile
The fire will dwindle
Into glowing ashes
For flames and love live such a little while
I won't forget
But I won't be lonely
I'll remember April
And I'll smile
This ought to scare the daylights out of'em. It better.
I spent the best part of the day carvin' that face. Rush it up.
Over here, across from his bunk. Here they come!
It's dark in here. Put on the lights.
They got me. They got me. Where?
Right in the middle of the excitement. Somebody's tryin' to kid you.
Funny kind of kiddin'. Every time I turn around you know what happens?
What? Some Indian lets go with an arrow... right by my kisser.
Come on, let's go to bed.
Hiya, partner.
Duke! Duke! What's the matter?
It's only a dummy. Look at it!
Those three boys put that there to scare you.
They're very successful. Touch it. It's only a dummy.
Feel it. That's all there is to it.
Come on, let's wash up.
I'm not scared of you.
Willoughby, go get me the soap. Go get me the soap!
Go get it yourself!
Willoughby, go get me the soap!
I'm not gonna get it! No!
Go get me the soap, Willoughby!
All right. That's better.
Dummy, eh?
I wish you was the other guy you look like.
I'd let you have it.
Fine joint. Ain't even a place to hang your hat.
I mean...
A knife, zip, right through my hat.
That's ridiculous.
No! Come on, come on!
Hey, Duke! It was right...
What do you know? What do you know...
There's your hat and there's no knife in it. No?
That hole wasn't put there by a moth.
Come here, I'll prove this Indian is only a dummy.
Get over here. What are you afraid of?
Look. Look. Now get with it and go to bed.
No more of this nonsense.
Dummy, huh?
You look like a guy that gave me Indian springwater.
The roof's leakin'.
I'd have sworn that guy moved.
Did you move? No.
I'll fix you. Put this in your mouth.
That's good. I'm gettin' hysterical or something.
I don't know.
It's only a dummy. No dummy's gonna do that...
Come here. No, I don't want to go in.
I'm tellin' ya, he's alive. I saw the thing...
What got into you all of a sudden?
What are you afraid of? I'm tellin' you this Indian's alive.
He done an awful lot of things to me. You're crazy, it's impossible.
I'll show ya. Go ahead, show me.
Now what? What are you doing?
Nothin'. It didn't work.
See him take a kick at me. That's a dummy, dummy.
Well, he's alive. Go on, get in bed.
What's the matter with you all of a sudden?
That's no way to act. Get into your nightgown and get some rest.
Where are you going? I'm gonna change in the closet.
I'm bashful. All right, go ahead in the closet.
What kept you? I was a little long, wasn't I?
Certainly, get to bed. I'll turn out the lights.
I don't want to hear of Indians from you anymore.
Understand? Get in there.
Don't mention Indians. That's all I do is think of'em.
I'm always dreamin' of'em. Think of something else.
Beautiful girls. I'll think of beautiful girls,
but I'll dream about Indians. Go to sleep.
How do you do? Something wrong?
Sanitarium? You the doctor? That's right.
Gotta have some rest. I need a lot of rest.
All night long when I sleep I see Indians.
Even when I turn around, I bump into Indians.
I gotta have rest. You've come to the right place.
You'll see no Indians here. Everything will be all right.
Just a minute, just a minute. Take it easy.
You're in bad shape. You do need a rest.
Wait, I'll see what I can do for you.
Fellas, do you mind giving this room up for tonight?
Come this way, please.
Come, come. Come on. Take it easy.
That's the boy. Oh, nurse? Yes?
This is your nurse.
Another Indian. You an Indian? You must be seeing things.
He's in bad shape. Make sure everything is quiet.
I gotta have rest. Hang your clothes up and get some sleep.
You'll be all right in the morning. If you need me, just call.
What a beautiful bed of roses. I think I'll water them.
That's enough, that's enough.
That's enough! That's plenty!
I'm gettin' plenty of rest tonight anyway.
Bite the dust! I won't!
You will. You will. I won't. I won't.
Oooooh!
Come in at once! Water! Pocahontas fainted.
Fainted? Yes, John Smith ran away with Minnehaha.
Phone for water! Phone for water?
I'll help you, kids. I'll phone. I don't like to see nobody faint.
Oh, boy, Pocahontas fainted. I want some water.
And I got it too.
- Bite the dust! - I won't!
- You will! - I won't!
I got him... with my finger.
Didn't work. Run out of bullets.
That's enough. Enough for me.
What are you doing? You want to shoot me?
Would you like to have your palm read?
Hee-hee-hee-hee!
General Custer!
Sitting Bull!
Duke! Duke! Hey, Duke! Wake up, will ya? Yeah?
I'm scared. What's the matter?
The whole room is full of Indians. Where, where?
I saw two guys come in. "Bite the dust." "I won't!"
The other guy shot him! Bang! Took him out!
Come here, come here! You've been dreaming.
What is it all about? A flock of Indians all over the room!
What do you mean, flock of Indians? Plenty of Indians.
There's not a single Indian here. Oh, no?
No! I know, they're married and got children.
What are you talkin' about? Everybody was in the room, but that one that throws knives.
Remember the hat? Are you still afraid of that?
Afraid? You think he's still around?
I'll prove to you he's not. Come here, come here.
He's not here.
If I know you, you're gonna do one of two things.
You're gonna break her heart or your neck.
Either way, you're gonna break my pocketbook.
Mr. Mitchell? Yeah?
I'm Ace Anderson. How are ya? Mr. Conway, my nursemaid.
How are you? Good evening.
I own a club downtown and I haven't seen you around.
I've been busy getting ready for the rodeo.
Sam Shaw figures the Lazy "S" team is a cinch to win with you on it.
I'm handling a $1,000 bet for him.
Mr. Shaw didn't strike me as being a betting man.
He isn't as a rule, but he spent so much money remodeling this place,
I guess he's counting on getting some of it back.
I'll be seeing you down at the club. Good-bye.
Mr. Anderson!
Look out, that guy didn't come just to talk.
I know it.
Yeah? I'll handle Mr. Shaw's bet myself at 10-to-1.
10-to-1? That's right, but my name's got to be kept out of it.
It's a deal.
Hey, wait a minute.
Aren't you riding for the Lazy "S" team?
You're betting $10,000 that your own team loses? That's right.
That makes it simpler, doesn't it?
I'll be seeing ya.
You know what that guy thinks? Let him think it.
Ten thousand smackers. You go and kill yourself in that rodeo...
just to make sure her old man wins that dough.
I give up.
Hey, Duke, you know what? I would love to dance.
Why don't you? I gotta learn how to do those kind of dances.
Go on out and do it. I'd like to.
Go ahead. You know the last...
Hey, Duke, I've been robbed. What's the matter?
I've been robbed. In here? You've been robbed?
I had it when I left the bunkhouse. You had what?
My other leg! I want to dance with the girls like everybody else.
Your other leg? I only got one leg!
What are ya talkin' about? What do you know?
Am I happy? You should be.
Hello. Do you dance? Why, yes.
You have nice weather for it. Sit down.
What's on your mind, Ace? I just wanted you to know...
that I bet 20 grand of my own money that the Lazy "S" loses tomorrow.
Why tell me? Well, see that you don't happen to win any events.
You ought to speak to Bronco Bob Mitchell. He's the headman.
I'm not worried about him. He'll see that they lose.
Bob Mitchell had me bet 10 grand at 10-to-1...
that the Lazy "S" outfit loses.
That's where I got my information.
Ace, I think you're lying.
Whether you are or not, I'm riding to win and no one's gonna stop me.
Same old couples forward and back
Forward again and sides dividing
You swing in the center and you swing on the side
With an Alabama left to the old left hand and back
We got orders from Ace to take you with us.
Here we go with the old mess wagon and a hind wheel broke
And the axle draggin' Meet your partner, promenade
You know where and I don't care
Hey, what kind of old-fashioned jive is that you've got
Take it from me, pops It's not so hot
You say it's an old square dance affair
Well, you're right there It sure is square
Don't be a chump Do a square dance but make it jump
What you say we all go rockin' and reelin'
Make the old Virginia reel really hop
The corn will thrive if you plant it in jive
I'll bet that it pops your top
Hit the timber and go rockin' and reelin'
Do the boogie if the beat is in eight
You're just nowhere if you dance in a square
'Cause you'll swing like a rusty gate
Put rhythm to your do-si-doin'
It's easy to make it mix
Keep jumpin' when you're heel and toein'
If you really want to get your kicks
Swing your partner when you're rockin' and reelin'
Do your dancin' like you haven't a care
You'll be first class You'll be cookin' with gas
If you go rockin' round the square
Ruby, Ruby We want Ruby
She's the gal on the mellow side
Ruby, come on, Ruby, just let rhythm be your guide
Give the calls Make 'em up
Do it in jive and break 'em up
Well, if you want me to do it I'll have these cats come on fit to kill
And we'll show you how they rock the square back in Harlem on Sugar Hill
Now if you really want to get your boots laced
Start out with the old shim-sham
And play back that jive I laid on you, pops
You're on your own So cut out and jam
What ya say we all go rockin' and reelin'
Make the old Virginia reel really hop
The corn will thrive if you plant it in jive
I'll bet it pops your top
Hit the timber go rockin' and reelin'
Do the boogie-woogie if the beat is in eight
You're just nowhere if your dancin' is square
'Cause you swing like a rusty gate
Put rhythm to your do-si-doin' It's easy to mix
Keepjumpin'when you're heelin'and toein'if you want to get your kicks
Swing your partner Go rockin' and reelin' like you haven't a care
You'll be first class You'll be cookin'with gas
Heelin', toein' Rock, rock rockin' 'n' reelin'
Rock, rock rockin' 'n' reelin'
When you're rockin' around the square
But, Miss Anne, that's what that fella told Alabam.
That's true, 'cause I heard it with my one good ear. This one...
This one over here. This one over here.
I don't believe it. Bob wouldn't bet against himself.
Then why not ask Alabam? Oh, no.
Morning, everybody. Uh-oh, there he is.
Why you, I ought to haul off and give you the dirtiest look you ever had in your life.
What is this? What's going on? Bob,
did you make a bet through Ace Anderson that the Lazy "S" would lose?
Oh, you heard?
Listen, I'm gonna ride today and I'm gonna ride to win.
As far as I'm concerned, you can do all your riding on a train heading east.
Now listen... I want to...
What are you doing?
Hey, wait a minute, you guys got a customer. Let's get going.
You don't understand. Oh, yes, we do. You're a bad boy!
You got me wrong. Oh, no! We ain't got you wrong.
If I got you wrong, I hope I knock a fender off this car.
Okay, get in. We're wrong.
So that's why I wanted to lose the money.
Ten thousand buckaroos to win a girl? That's love, all right.
That's inflation. It's all your fault. You had to spoil a romance.
You and your eavesdropping. Eavesdropping?
I never dropped an eave in my life.
I ought to give you back to the Indians. Anything but that!
What do you know? Somebody must be usin' a slingshot.
Sit still. I'll get it.
All right, reach.
Come on, give me your gun.
What's the big idea? Take it easy and you won't get hurt.
I'll go get help!
Ooo-ooo-ooo!
I don't care what your reasons were for betting on the Lazy "S" to lose.
I can be positive they don't win by holding you and Alabam.
Yeah, we got you good, Bronco Bob.
It ain't as easy to escape from here as it was in them books of yours.
Why? Are you a fan of mine? I'll say I am.
You know that book, I Escaped from Outlaws? That was swell.
Remember, Ace, I was readin'it to you.
That took place in a cabin like this, didn't it? Yeah, it did.
There I was, a prisoner. The outlaw chief was pacing up and down.
The window was open. Now let's see...
Come on!
Help!
Hey, you're hurt. Never mind that. Let's get back to the rodeo.
Let's make sure our friend stays here first.
I gotta get help. We should have stayed and fought it out with them.
Hey, hey, look! Stop, stop, stop.
Look! Look! Oh, just Indians.
Come on, get going!
Come on, step on it! Go ahead, step on it! Go away.
Come on, they're getting closer.
Way back! They have no brakes!
Attaboy, Willoughby!
Come on, step on it!
Hey, take off your brake! Take off your brake!
Take off the brake? Take off your brake!
Take it off. Take it off! What do I do now?
Release it! Okay!
Here they come! Don't let go of the wheel!
Willoughby, grab the wheel!
What did you let go of the wheel for?
I can't drive! What's the matter?
All right, I'll take care of everything.
What's the matter? What are you doing?
Hey, DiMaggio got another hit.
Put that down!
Hey, look, no hands! No, don't!
Something wrong? See my hat?
No. There it is.
Thank you.
We got rid of the Indians.
Look out!
Sunday driver! Never mind him. Your troubles are behind you.
Hey, wait a minute!
Oh, boy, that...
There they are again. Go ahead!
Oh, fluid drive.
Hey! Who's chasing who?
Boy, was that a close shave. You said it.
Faster, faster. Keep it going.
Go get help, go get help! Come here, come here!
You went the wrong way! This way! Hurry up!
Hey! I didn't see that! Get it out!
Hey, Duke, does this place look familiar to you?
Ya dope! We're right back at the spot we started from!
Ain't I uncanny? You are. Now listen to me.
Take the turns I tell ya to take. Bob's in trouble. Now get going.
Let's see who's in this broncobusting contest.
I don't suppose there's any doubt of his showing up, is there, Conway?
This is dull stuff, Manning. What do you say we go find some real fun?
The next event is the girls'fancy-riding contest.
Good luck, there's a lot more at stake than the prize money.
A lot more? Yeah, Ace Anderson had somebody put up $10,000 that we'd lose.
Ten thousand do...
Why, Dad,
then Bob...
Bob wanted to lose so we'd win. That doesn't make sense.
It certainly does. Come on!
Hey, come on! Hey, Alabam! Get in the car.
He's hurt. Oh, it's nothing. It's just a little...
Blood.
The Lazy "S" outfit's in second place with 27 points,
including the first place won by Miss Anne Shaw.
And now the final contestant in broncobustin',
also representing the Lazy "S" Ranch,
that celebrated personality, Bronco Bob Mitchell.
Where's Bob? Has anyone seen him? No!
Alabam hasn't shown up either.
That's strange. Anne?
You don't mean that you want Bob to ride? Of course I want him to ride.
Bronco Bob Mitchell is wanted at the chutes. Judges are waiting.
He was gonna ride, was he?
Bronco Bob Mitchell, having failed to appear, the contest is forfeited.
The winner is... But wait, here he is!
Where have you been? Get Alabam to first aid right away.
What happened to him? He got shot. I'll explain later.
Look, about that bet... We know all about that. You get in there and ride!
Ride 'em, cowboy!
We win! We win! We win!
Hello, bridegroom.
Ride 'em, cowboy ride
We're all together side by side
All good men and every one a rooting tooting son of a gun
Come on and ride 'em, cowboy ride
Bust 'em high and wide
And when our pay's been roped and tied
We'll be off to paint the town to set 'em up and drink 'em down
Come on and ride 'em, cowboy ride
Give me a life out on the plains, a horse with lightning in his veins
And for my comrades the men of the West
A cowboy's friends are rough and tough but they're his friends and that's enough
They're tried and true men and they're the best
So ride 'em, cowboy ride
We're all together side by side
They're all good men and every one a rooting tooting son of a gun
Come on and ride 'em, cowboy ride
Bust 'em high and wide
And when our pay's been roped and tied
We'll be off to paint the town to set 'em up and drink 'em down
We're gonna ride 'em, cowboy ride